This week has been an emotional one for me. I feel like I am the protagonist of my own nostalgic film. When the character is finally happy and then some ironic twist in the plot they end up hurt. Last Thursday I was feeling pretty awesome it was just another ordinary day, but the only thing that was bugging me was my right eye. It was getting a bit watery and I was fearing the worse. I tried not to stress out about the situation. I got off work and went home.
Then on Friday my right eye continued to feel dry and watery. I went to work and came back home around 3:00 and that's when I knew that I had fallen once again victim to "bells palsy." A couple years ago I ended with bells palsy because I was having too much stress with school and work. I had to learn the hard way from my doctor about this disease. There's no cure for it and no one knows for sure what causes it. It gradually heals on it's own, but of course the person must massage their face and think positive that this thing will go away.
Right now I feel highly self-conscious about my face and how my right eye is all watery. I could barely talk right, because my lip goes to the right side. I am pretty lucky that I can smile, but I don't have a true expression on my right eye that changes my expression to happiness. I have been watching You Tube Videos of people showing their progress with the disease. I'll be honest but I just want to stay home and not show my face in public for awhile. But I know that I can't do that and I have to continue existing in the world even if people look at me funny or stare.
In reality I don't want to deal with this cramp, but I can't let it run my life for now. All I can say to anyone who reads this post is to be kind to people with disabilities.
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