Currently Obsessing on Luna is Honey...

New Thoughts...

I was thinking about writing a poem about a "Superhero"...My friend told me that in her favorite comic book shop that is called Nostalgic Comixxx...It is located in Alhambra..there is going to be an open mic night...where you can read a poem...
This poem will be the first one of this year that I would write...
I haven't written a poem since 2008...
It's been a long time...
but I want the words to flow on their own...
My poems get made in the most random places like when I am walking or when I'm driving...
Then I rush home to write them up...

A Nostalgic Feeling...

I have to be quite honest, but I was feeling a bit nostalgic yesterday...I was watching music videos of Yoko Ono and John Lennon and the way their love story was so magical...the music the art..I never thought that the whole issue of not being in a relationship has never made me feel so lonely...but for some reason yesterday I was thinking about how great it will be to have my heart feel something special for another human being...having someone to technically hold hands with and share a couple of laughs with...perhaps even grow old with them...

I never been the girlfriend type,
or the insecure one...if someone is with you is because they are willing to love every inch of you and the need to be jealous should not be even a consideration..

But as I laid in my bed I just wondered if there was a boy out there who was feeling the same kinda way like me...if they are so unlovable...perhaps unapproachable..

I never have felt the need to be desperate for affection...I just wanted to happen on its own..
A couple of words...
and the heart wanting more...
a nice conversation...
that will glue the whole moment into a blissful memory..
and endless possibility..

Girls who complain about their boyfriends...

Please take me out of your conversation. I was hanging out with a couple of colleagues at work. All of the women I was gather with are in loving relationships. I'm the only one who is not in a relationship. The three women were discussing about all the issues they have with their boyfriends families and mother in laws. Only one of them is married she is pretty young 23...and the other two are in their early 20's...I couldn't believe how much heartache and difficulty it is to be in a looooong lasting relationship. They went on for about 30 minutes. I couldn't quite add anything to the conversation, because I haven't been in a relationship in such a long time.
I could only recall that the person I dated for about 4 years was really neat. His mom was quite genuinely nice to me and since I didn't quite hanged around his family that often then I had nothing to complain about it. He probably had more things to complain about me then I had about him. It drive him insane when I wanted to write a poem with him. The only contribution he did on one of my poems was to make it gloomy and dark instead of cheerful and sweet. There was a point in the relationship were I wanted out, but afraid to be alone. I remember how he didn't take me seriously the first time I wanted to break up with him.
When I was listening to these girls complain so much about their current situation. I just realized how glad I was that I didn't end up marrying Mr. Gloomy. I probably would of been sitting there contributing to the bashing of men. (pretending to be happy) They continued on and on...and I couldn't even find an excuse to leave... they finally realized that I wasn't saying anything and they all turned to me to ask me if I had relationship issues.
I was like, "No, the only drama I have it is to write academically for grad-school that's the only thing I have going on at the present time." They all looked at me and they said, "Lucky." I bet they were feeling sad for me, because I don't have a boyfriend."
I've been fine with my lonely self for a very looooooong time.

I wanted to be your friend...(boy)..

My friend and I always have funny boy anecdotes...We always find ways to talk about random boys we don't know a thing about...She found this guy at a comic book shop he works there it is a new place in Alhambra. She truly enjoys comic books...But the thing that struck her the most was the nice guy who works there.. He recommended her some kool comic books plus he gave her a free comic book for the purchase of the comic books she had bought. The conversation was quite sweet...(He gave her Superman's wedding)...My friend couldn't stop thinking of how nice he was. We gave him a nickname Romanin...that's not his name...but his real name reminded me of noodles...ha, ha...I can't wait to go to the comic book store to see Romanin in person. Since my friend is illustrating a comic book...there's going to be a lot fun boy anecdotes for her boy characters...

I happened to have found a kool looking guy that works at the local Walmart...We haven't quite given him a nickname quite yet...Because like my brother said "He looks like he belongs at the Urban Outfitters."...I just wonder if he is writing some kind of paper on working at the Walmart...He appears to be into art or perhaps he is in a band...I picture him working at Amoeba, because he looks kool like that....I can't wait for my friend to see him and what kind of nickname we will give him.. We need the inspiration to create our boy characters...You never know who will be next in our funny boy anecdote stories...

A Distraction..

I was very happy on Thursday when I was able to chat with a friend who had left to Argentina for a couple of months and he just came back to the states this week. I was very excited for his return, but the feeling was short lived...Simply because he will be moving to San Francisco this upcoming week..To be more exact on Tuesday..

I have always wanted to visit San Francisco, because I didn't get a chance to go when my brother had an art show there...He has always told me that I am going to fall in love with the city and not want to return to LA. I told my friend about it and he was like, "You should go to San Francisco." I just started grad-school and I can't be thinking about taking a trip anywhere. But I can't believe he is moving to this beautiful place...Maybe this is the bit of motivation I needed to actually make the trip up there..

I got to continue working on my academic paper...But it sure is nice to have an outlet were I could write freely and not feel like I'm being graded on my grammar.

A Moment...

I've been working on my orientation pieces for grad-school...It's due this weekend...I'm not quite sure what gets me so distracted that I can't focus in finishing the videos...I think I'm getting a bit nervous about the whole thing of going back to school and having deadlines.
I wanted so badly to edit my novel..But I haven't quite figured out that yet. I'm trying my best to not be so complicated.

Life happens in every waking moment...I think when I applied to grad school I never thought I was going to be accepted. I just wanted to apply and see what could be; I didn't anticipated this at all. I never quite thought of it...

That's what makes me so nervous about the whole process of it.. The people who are in the program have this knowledge... But I have to train myself to think academically, because I still enjoy my "Dear Diary" moments of myself...